So, as many of you who are close to me know, I've always strived to live my life by a principle of "no secrets" - nothing in my world is kept private, there's NOTHING the world doesn't know, unless it's so minor I just haven't bothered telling anyone. The few secrets I've had on and off (none of which stay secret for very long because I just bubble up and burst inside needing to tell someone - everyone) have only made me feel awful when I had them.

For example, one of them - there was a girl I was really close to and I believed that God was calling us to be together. Being unsure, and not wanting to be thought insane (GOD telling two people to be together in the way He did - it's a long story, not a secret, I'll tell you if you ask - is pretty out there) and knowing she also worried we'd be thought insane (which doesn't make much sense given we go to a Pentecostal church where the belief that God still speaks to us is pretty much what distinguishes us from many other churches). Well, that whole "secret" thing lasted oh, about two weeks before anyone who knew us at all knew the whole story. Were we thought insane? By one person. A grand total of one person, and not even a terribly close person. All the stress of trying to keep a secret to prevent one person from thinking we were nuts? Totally not worth it!

In fact, I can't think of anything more stressful than keeping something a secret. I hate it when others tell me their secrets because there's nothing harder for me than keeping something secret. I will, in love and in prayer, because it's their business and they trusted me. I strive to never break someone's trust...

But the no secrets thing for me... tons of you seem to have secrets. People even say I'm nuts when I tell them I strive not to have any, almost as if secrets and private things others don't know are a fact of life for them. Here's my question for y'all - and feel free to email me on this one ( This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it ) - how do you handle the stress of keeping secrets? Wouldn't it be easier to just let the world see who you really are and what you're up to?

My biggest shortcoming of the day - trusting God. I feel Him calling me to make some big changes (possibly as big as moving to Nashville, TN despite having no idea what I'd do or where I'd work there). Do I trust God enough to just get in my car and go? How can I be sure it really is God's voice I hear? This is my greatest struggle, and one I'm happy to let the whole world know - because the burden is lighter and the prayers for it are more numerous!

Blessings all,

Mark